Here’s my review of this indispensable book, Divorce Poison by Dr. Richard Warshak. This book was truly a lifesaver and helped me save the relationship with my daughter, Divorce Poison by Dr. Richard Warshak.
Is your once kind child saying hateful things to you? Is your child rejecting you? Refusing to see you?
Those are huge warning signs you cannot afford to brush off. Yes, we all think that our divorce will be congenial and both sides will put the child first, but emotions have a way of screwing up even the most amicable split.
But you and your spouse are respectful. You’re getting along.
I don’t care. Read this book.
Yes, we all think that our divorce will be congenial and both sides will put the child first, but emotions have a way of screwing up even the most amicable split.
And so you need to read this book so that you can detect the warning signs of parental alienation. A fancy way of saying that your spouse is trying to turn your child against you.
If you are going through a divorce, or know someone who is, I hope that you’ll share this book. It’s a MUST read for anyone who shares custody of a child.
The book is Divorce Poison: How to Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashing by Dr. Richard A. Warshak.
Divorce Poison is the definitive guide on preventing parental alienation; where one parent seeks to turn their child against the other parent. It’s common in divorce and incredibly damaging to children and the relationship with one parent.
How can you tell if your ex is trying to turn your child against you?
Here are some signs:
A once loving child is suddenly rude and constantly bashing one parent.
The child rejects one parent while idolizing the other.
One parent is all bad. The other parent; perfect.
The child who once had a close loving relationship with the parent now refuses to see them.
Be careful. These are all signs of parental alienation at work.
The child, even though acting out, is the victim. The real perpetrator is the angry parent seeking to break the bond between parent and child.
This book gives details examples of how to spot alienation at work, the motives behind alienation and why your spouse might be attempting this, plus strategies to re-establish a bond with a child who’s been brainwashed.
Dr. Warshak gives you the knowledge to counteract relationship sabotage and heal your damaged relationship. He also has a chapter devoted to deciding when it’s time to seek professional help.
The book’s most important advice is this: confront it. React. Respond. Don’t turn away and think that alienation will go away. Inaction and silence don’t work.
The author’s website, www.warshak.com, has resources and recommendations for families dealing with alienation. (The author even has a DVD series for kids who’ve been the victim of alienation, Welcome Back, Pluto, available on his website.)
Even if your divorce is drama free, be prepared and get a copy. Being aware of the warning signs could save your relationship with your child if parental alienation ever begins.
Divorce Poison has a powerful message: If you are losing the loving relationship with your child, fight back before it is too late.
Have you experienced alienation in the relationship with your child? How have you handled it? If you have, please share your experiences.
–Rosie
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After 28 years of marriage, my husband sent a vindictive, demeaning email to our 3 adult children and printed it out for our then 15 year old to read. Our oldest daughter hasn't spoken to me in 2 1/2 years because she doesn't believe her father did anything wrong. He took the heart of me--which was my children. He poisoned them and they'll never look at me the same again. Now, my oldest daughter is pregnant and due with her first child and I found out by seeing a post on FB from my son-in-law. She's due this month and I have never seen her pregnant other than a picture and I've never felt the baby move in her belly. My ex has NO remorse whatsoever and feels very righteous and entitled to what he's done. Now, I'm not only alienated from my daughter, but now I'm alienated from my grandchild as well.
I've reached out MULTIPLE times asking my daughter to speak with me and she says she "isn't ready". I send texts telling her "I love you", "I'm thinking about you", and I've wished her a Happy Birthday, etc. Her heart is HARD. I'm lost and don't know what more to do. I feel like I'm detaching in a way because there's no communication and I feel like I have to in order to protect myself. It's too much pain and sorrow to bear in my mind and heart.
Tomorrow the divorce will be final for a year and he met someone, sent 8 selfies and a description of her to our kids by text to introduce her and then two weeks later, they got engaged. They even sent their wedding invitations to our 2 daughters who live with me to MY address. I'm just being crushed on all sides from this guy. Constant filing of petitions over petty things and he loses EVERY time he takes me to court. Calling the cops and claiming I'm harassing him because I called him out and told him to leave our children out of this mess....and I literally feel a fear every time I go to my mailbox. It just never seems to end.
I am mourning for a child that is alive. I'm mourning that I'll have a grandchild that i will never see and will never know me, but a woman my ex knew for 4 weeks before he got engaged will hold my grandbaby.
I need to buy this book.