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    Categories: BlogDating

Good news. Dating again after divorce is not as bad as you think.

Why dating again after divorce is not as bad as you think.

Dating after divorce usually gets a bad rap and for good reason. There are plenty of reasons why dating again after divorce is stressful, awkward and kinda weird.

But, I’m here to give you another opinion you may not have heard before.

I’m here to tell you that dating again after divorce, when you are over forty, after your marriage crashes and burns, can be many things and one of those is simply this.

FUN.

 

Dating again after a divorce,after being married can be exciting.

That whole dating dance can be a rush.

You get to revisit adolescent crushes and that flippy feeling you get in your stomach when the phone rings.

Is that him? Yes, he called! (Or more likely, he texted!)

Even in your forties, you can still feel the pre-date jitters, your limbs all jangly. You can still feel those feelings that you weren’t sure you were capable of feeling again.

You’ll discover an odd human trait that wrinkles and teen dating angst can coexist in the same body. Yes, strange but true.

The thought of dating again is going to be scary as hell. Wouldn’t anybody be scared of wading back into the dating pool? But wouldn’t it be scary to do anything you haven’t done in decades?

You’re Probably More Comfortable Being Yourself Now.

There are good things about dating after divorce. Like being happy with yourself. Like finally being comfortable in your own skin; lumps, bumps, maybe a few wrinkles and some cellulite and stretch marks too.

Being OK with who you are. Maybe, finally knowing what you really want.

Dating after divorce is more direct.

You are not that silly young girl anymore. You’ve matured. Grown up.

This time around you know your faults and are at peace with them.

At this point, you know your failings are most likely here to stay so you don’t have to hide them. They are a part of the imperfect package that is you.

So even though you haven’t had to go on an actual date in decades, that’s OK.

You’re already ready. Dating is kinda like riding a bicycle. You may be a little unsteady at first but you never really forget how to do it. (While you’re at it, I did write a post about the one guy to steer clear of if you’re dating again over 40.)

You’re Probably A Lot More of a Badass.

Life and painful experiences have a way of bringing out your own personal badass. You’re probably less patient and more to the point after your marriage breaks up. That’s a good thing.

We put up with less nonsense. People totally sense that and will respect you more because of it.

The best way to get comfortable dating again after divorce is simple. Do it.

You’ll probably have some awkward moments but that’s OK. That’s how we learn in life, love and dating again after divorce.

So how have you found dating after divorce? Please share your feelings on dating after divorce.

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Rosie :

View Comments (5)

  • I actually enjoyed myself while I was dating after divorce. I gave myself permission to have fun while I met new people, and I kept my eye on the "prize" -- meeting the last love of my life. And it worked! I even wrote a book about the experience to give hope to other divorced singles. http://amzn.to/120GPWo

    • thank you for sharing your experience! It can be fun if you set out to make it fun. Look forward to seeing your book!

  • So true Rosie!!!! After my first divorce, I knew exactly what I didn't want and this time didn't play the games. The things I no longer worried about were freeing if that makes sense. I really believe the wisdom led me to the love of my life.

  • Are all the woman in their marriage perfect and innocent. Does that mean men are dog that they go behind another woman n betray their wife. Confessing to your spouse that you're not happy in marriage and that you've found your love after 15 years of marriage is punishable offence for that man and his love.
    What about the 1st wife who betrayed her husband post marriage keeping someone else child. And abusing her husband for second affair....

  • After the separation. I started to date a guy. And he is my boyfriend now. He is everything I ever wanted from a man in my life. He loves me unconditionally and he is doing everything to show me and build a future with me. He takes good care of my kid. They stay great together. My kid loves him... and the most important thing is I can be myself around him ❤️