Communicating with your ex: relationship tips I’ve learned from a six pound chihuahua. Inspiration comes in funny places sometimes. One of my best relationship coaches is my chihuahua. Pound for pound, she’s got some great nonverbal communications we can all learn from. She’s six pounds at most, but Custard my Chihuahua could teach us all a few things […]
Divorce Is Like A Bikini Wax. Let it Rip.
I had an important realization about my divorce recently. I was naked from the waist down and waiting for a woman with a hot stick to singe my nether regions with melted wax when it hit me, divorce and a bikini wax are way too much alike. Both experiences are a) embarrassing, b) expensive and c) very painful. In both processes […]
Hey divorced loser, should you go to your high school reunion?
Hey divorced loser, should you go to your high school reunion? In the airport, just back from my high school reunion. At first, I was too afraid to attend. What kind of judgement would I find? I envisioned everyone else’s perfect life and how much crappier mine looked in comparison. Do I dare go back home when my life was […]
From underemployed to the stripper pole. My genius employment solution.
I’ve been “underemployed” for a few years now. In case you didn’t know, “underemployed” is just a nice way of saying, working for the same amount you earned slinging fries at that fast food job in high school. Times are getting tight, I was looking at two possible career paths: 1) harvesting my organs in South America. I mean, […]
A Poem About Divorce: The Power of Me.
A Poem About Divorce: The Power of Me. A Power About Divorce. THE POWER OF ME Don’t let the cotton candy hair and pleasing apple smile fool you. I am made of steel and spikes, Bone and ore There lies beneath this soft white skin-a core of asphalt. A mighty center. Miles of road. hairpin turns. Freeway walls of profane […]