Snap out of it! 3 women not to turn into after a relationship breakup.

Yes, a breakup changes you. I’m hoping that it’s turning me into someone better. (We’ll see). But stress has a strange effect on people. Some people become stronger and better after going through a breakup. Others? They become one of these women.

3 women not to be after divorce

Here are the 3 women that I so don’t want to be after my divorce.

3 women you don't want to become after divorce

The Man Hater.

Right after I separated from my husband, I went to a neighborhood get together, and there SHE was in the kitchen. The Man Hater, hunched over a huge glass of wine, and spewing her “wisdom” about men. She heard that I’d just recently separated and she was on me like white on rice.

According to The Man Hater: all men are a-holes. All men cheat. All men are liars.

When you see this woman in the grocery store you hide behind a package of Toaster Struedel and pray to God she doesn’t see you. Anger like that should not be in the grocery aisle.

Sure I’m divorced and all but I like men, no I LOVE men. I’m totally pro-men. I kinda adore the males of our species. They’re handsome, interesting to watch, fun to cuddle with, can have awesome biceps and grow hair in places we can’t.

3 women you don't want to become after divorce

Princess Dark Cloud.

You know her. She has the crappiest life ever and she’s ready to fight you to claim that prize.

(Hey, we’ve all got our shit to shovel, but somehow hers is always the worst.)

Her divorce may be over but she wears the turmoil of it like a big Girl Scout badge. She drinks her downer juice every morning to fuel up for a big day of ruining everyone else’s upbeat mood.

If you are in a good mood, she’ll change that in no time.

She randomly shares sunshine-y info like:

“Did you know LA will slide into the ocean during the next big earthquake?”

“You hair looks thin, the radiation from your cellphone must be causing your hair to fall out.”

“My sister was your age when she died.”

She likes to hang out in the kitchen at work and wait for her next victim who comes in to refill their coffee.

Oh, and she’s also sharing upbeat quotes on Facebook.

3 women not to become after divorce

3 women not to become after divorce

The Garage Sale Girl

You see her and think, Oh My God, you used to be so cute, what happened? Her breakup is what happened. It chewed her up and spit her out.

She’s not even trying anymore. She dressed like a garage sale.

She’s wearing that sweatshirt again from her kids 6th grade science fair.

She’s rocking drugstore reading glasses held together with a paper clip.

Her footwear selection? An old pair of Keds she uses for gardening.

And her hair? A mass of gray roots poinking up everywhere.

(P.S. If you ever see me in a stained sweatshirt with gray roots, please grab a box of Nice ‘N Easy 9G Natural Light Golden Blonde, hold me down and apply. I must not be in my right mind.)

Now if that’s the look she’s going for, more power to her. But this isn’t who she wants to be. This is just what happened along the way to totally giving up on herself and life.

I know these women really well because I’ve been all these women during the course of my five (count ’em!) years of divorce.

But I’ll be damned if I’ll let my breakup turn me into one of them permanently.


And if you enjoy my posts, I’d be super flattered if you’d share them with a friend. 

Thanks strong ladies for reading! 


#MidLifeLuv Linky


  1. says

    I came out of my divorce a lot stronger, and found it to be a profound growth experience. I have seen all three of the women you profile in this post, and I’m grateful that I didn’t become them. I flirted with them all I’m sure, but didn’t let them move in permanently. Great post.

    • says

      so glad you made it out the other side without becoming one of these gals permanently! I think we are lucky to have moved on with our sanity intact! thanks for the comments!

  2. says

    Thankfully I’ve never had to BE one of those women and will be celebrating my 38th Anniversary this year! BUT, with that said I think I’ve met some of those women during my life and like you said, there comes a time when they really need to SNAP OUT OF IT! Buy hey, that happens when any of us go through something dramatic and traumatic. There is a time to heal and mourn the passing, and then time to get on with it. Thanks for the reminders! #MidLifeLuv

    • says

      Thanks for stopping by! You are right going through something traumatic is tough on everyone but you do need to finally get on with it. Appreciate the comment!

  3. says

    I may have become the Garage Sale girl for a short period. I was never the man hater…but, boy, I have a good friend that sure is one…always talking in my ear about the evil generalizations of men. Since she’s been in the single game for longer than she wants, it’s easy for her to go there…and she may want to take me down with her. Nope. Not gonna do it – Me? I LOVE men too! 🙂 #midlifeluv

    • says

      yay for you and not getting sucked into her hate! oh yes that man hater wants all of us in her club too. I’m like you not going there!! thanks so much for stopping by and commenting! #midliveluv rules!!

  4. says

    Hi Rosie. Nice to meet you. I called the girl whose clothes fit me best after my divorce, ‘Wallow In Self Pity Girl’ – probably Princess Dark Cloud to you… ‘Glad to hear you’ve learned how to start steering clear of them all! #MidLifeLuv

    • says

      Hello! So glad that you moved out of “Wallow in Self Pity!” It’s not easy. I so appreciate the comment and support. We are in this together!

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