Divorce Is Like A Bikini Wax. Let it Rip.

I had an important realization about my divorce recently. I was naked from the waist down and waiting for a woman with a hot stick to singe my nether regions with melted wax when it hit me, divorce and a bikini wax are way too much alike.

how divorce is like a bikini wax

Both experiences are a) embarrassing, b) expensive and c) very painful.

In both processes you have to expose yourself in ways you never wanted. You have to let a lot of people get all up in your business.

This stranger flailing a hot stick near my tender parts was my breakthrough, I had been handling my divorce all wrong!

What I’ve realized is the best way to get through either messy and painful experience is to hang on and just let ‘er rip.

What Divorce and a bikini wax have in common

 

 

Next time you get your lady parts defuzzed, just watch your waxer.

She’s going to illustrate the correct way you should handle your divorce proceedings.

Does the nice woman kinda, sorta pull that hot melted wax off your hooha? Does she do it slowly?

Hell no! She grabs that wax strip and rips it off like she means it. Does it hurt? Hell yes!

But every waxing professional already knows what we as women in a divorce need to learn, moving slowly only makes the entire process stickier and more painful. Just like a divorce. So take a cue from her. Grab a hold of yourself and get down to business.

Divorce is horrible no matter how you handle it.

It’s going to be painful. But how long that pain lasts, whether it will be over quickly or will drag on for years, depends entirely on how quickly and decisively you are willing to act.

So stop dillydallying already and get on with it.

If you don’t believe me, just handle your divorce like I did.

Be timid.

Be tentative about making any decisions. Sorta find an attorney, kinda start filing your paperwork.

You’ll end up creating more ugly pain than if you’d just reacted quickly and taken action.

In waxing as in divorce, I now know, the sooner it’s over the sooner the pain stops.

So take it from that slightly scary lady standing over your groin with hot wax; decide on your course of action, find an attorney, pound out your agreements. And make like a bikini wax and LET ‘ER RIP!

Thanks for stopping by! If you enjoyed my slightly saucy take on divorce, please share! 

Comments

    • says

      Thanks for the visit.
      Hang in there. It’s a crazy, wacky journey. I’m almost going on 5 years and still not complete. Good luck and stay strong!

  1. SUZANNE COOK says

    This was hilarious and just what I needed. Divorced twice. I’m good at that but bad at marriage too. I was teasing my lawyer that I was pretty sure they should offer a buy two get one free policy. Sigh. Marriage is like shoes. Sometimes you think the fit is perfect but after you have been wearing them for too long you realize no matter how pretty they are. They are not worth being in pain everyday. However you should never forget the memories you had while wearing those shoes.

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